Abuse is when you are hurt Physically      Emotionally      Sexually     Mentally    Spiritually and especially by those you know well and trust. It can be by

Adult to Child – Child Abuse

Youth to youth  - Juvenile

Youth to Adult  - Vulnerable Adult Abuse / Parental Abuse

Youth to Child  - Juvenile and Child Abuse

Abuse can also be self-inflicted by

• Lack of self-discipline
• Not taking to counsel
• Indulgence in unhealthy habits, dangerous, ungodly and unlawful activities
• Choice of association with People who influence you negatively 
• Being in self-denial for help and blaming others for your actions and negative outcome of wrong choices made.

Abuse is Neglect, the persistent lack of appropriate care of children, including love, stimulation, safety, nourishment, warmth, education and medical attention. It can have a serious effect on a child's physical, mental and emotional development

Physical Abuse

PHYSICAL: Is when you are hurt or injured by an adult? Being bullied all the time, punched, slapped, kicked, shoved, burnt, strangled, injured and sometimes death. In addition, scared to live, and Peer pressured into unlawful activities.

Examples in relation with Child Abuse:

• child labour
• Find children walking, jumping and running to meet up the pace of moving vehicles, to exchange articles for money with motorists along major busy roads and streets of the nation.
• Children lifting and carry heavy goods on their head for sale, which even their parents cannot lift from the ground
• Bus conductors attempt pushing them off their vehicles
• Child trafficking  leads numerous serious medical cases such as severely broken bones

Emotional Abuse

EMOTIONAL: Is being constantly criticised and rejected. You are not given love or affection, continually shouted at, blamed, threatened, ignored, punished in degrading way or humiliated, seeks permission to go out to shops or family and friends. No more in control of yourself or time, panic, Peer pressure, lack of self control and discipline

Examples in relation with Child Abuse

• Effect on Nigerian children who act as guide to beggars, commercial bus drivers rarely show the urge or intention to convey them with their buses because as beggars, they are seen as people incapable of affording the fares.
• Where parents and guardians have failed to give their children godly provisions of supervisions or guardianship, and the children are left with no option than to take to wrong associates like obtaining different gambling skills from their role model and exhibiting them.
• Child abuse victims live rest of their lives with low self esteem and feeling  abandoned
• Verbal abuse of a child in the form of shouting, threats, and degrading or humiliating criticism
• Emotional deprivation i.e. lack of caring, loving and empathy towards the child.

Sexual Abuse

SEXUAL: When you are enforced to take part in any kind of sexual activity against your wishes. This includes being touched sexually or being told to touch another person sexually, looking at pornographic videos or magazines together. Harassed by sexual suggestions and comments. Being enforced to have sex with another person. Even in marriage, this is also termed as deliberate act of abuse.  Rape, incest to defilement of young girls.

Examples in relation with Child Abuse

• Children hawking as a result decides to sleep by the road side is raped by a number of unidentified gangs
• Young female hawkers lured by men to their houses or elsewhere, where their goods are exchanged with equivalent cost of their goods and engage them in sex with or without their consent
• Child prostitution 
• Many girls/boys serving as house helps are exploited sexually and raped by their employers and agents
• Indulging under 18years old in sexual activity with or without consent.
• Parents marrying under 18yrs out, and to men/women old enough to be their Fathers/mothers.
• Teachers & Senior students sexually molesting students at school.
• Church elders/leaders sexually molesting children in the name of praying / deliverance.
• Family members incest / rape children.

Mental Abuse

MENTAL: When you are afraid of sleeping or waking up in the morning through bullying and believing the bully’s fault – finding in you. Threats of your safety, insanity without him/her, denied, dislike, your capability as a mother and wife, scared to leave, depression, Indulgence in unhealthy habits and ungodly activities.
Significant life events such as the death of a loved one, a divorce, a move to a new area, and even a break-up of relationship, disfellowshipped, stress, chronic illness can contribute to depression, as can the side effects of certain medicines or infections.

Examples in relation with Child Abuse

• Exposing children to unnecessary hardships and odds in life – Children hawking in busy roads as an alternative to education in order to generate money for their parents
• Most Nigerian culture makes child abuse victims to keep quiet and not make any disclosures to their parents because they may end up receiving more torture from their parents. 
• Child abuse victim’s wellbeing is affected and unconsciously leads to mental instability.
• Shutting a child in a dark closet and  in isolation, such as denying a child friends
• Abusive parent keeps extremely tight control over their children, thereby making him or her sense of curiosity and wonder at the world and will stop trying them to exercising his or her mind on positivity in life
• Multiple exposures of a child to violence and trauma victims to get stressed out that leads to permanent physiological changes. 
• Subjecting a child under your care to torture like restricting general welfare needs, for refusing your sexual suggestions at home or at school.
• Constant misuse of authority to demean the child’s natural worth and essence to live.

Spiritual Abuse

• Is the misuse of leadership to further one’s selfish interests, using authority to manipulate and maltreat others by deed or words that demean, humiliate or shame the natural worth and dignity of a person, false accusation and repeated negative criticism.
• Is using religion to back control 
• Is Playing God with people’s life 
• Is Bewitched/ Mind controlling 
• Is Being deceived with relationship 
• Is Alcoholism 
• Is drug taking 
• Is isolation or separation from group/church/family 
• Is a form of emotional / mental abuse by undermining a person’s reasoning and logic Skills, Restricting a person’s understanding of the world, affecting relationships with others. 
• Is more severe than physical abuse, because it’s the cause of all sorts of social problems and inequalities in various aspects of society today 
• Is an INFRINGE OF 11 counts of YOUR HUMAN RIGHTS

HOW THE ABUSIVE LEADER TARGET VICTIMS FOR ABUSE

• Exercise control by questioning loyalty of those who disagree with them.
• Discipline those who contradict them 
• Ensures that meeting with you is an unequal confrontation by gathering people around him who do not question the way he uses authority 
• False accusation – by accusing victims of wrong motives and improper attitudes 
• Victims being manipulated by false accusations will not be able to submit to the process of reconciliation due to false judgement 
• Twisted methods of false accusation from the start to avoid restoration 
• Trap to accuse – no Matt.18 (vse. 33) attempt to work things out 
• Portrayed as enemies, rebellious 
• Others / congregation told to avoid you 
• Betrayed by people you love 
• Shunned by those friends of week before and now nervously avoiding you – even at the price of treasured friendships. (Unfortunately one man’s evil intent could produce so much destruction in life and put an end to so many relationships that you thought were real) 
• Coerced resignation of elders who opposed him. 
• Flattery to nurture people’s feelings of inclusion & importance 
• New titles and positions fabricated to reward as a team player 
• Compulsory meetings 
• Appoint an informant as a sign of loyalty to leadership, he lets them know of anyone who is questioning or struggling

Examples in relation with Child Abuse

• Children walking & hawking & falling asleep by the road side and being lured away for ritual purposes,  having some of their body organs removed for this ritual purpose.
• Initiation of a child through food / drink into witchcraft by elderly witches, as they are more susceptible to their spells and are quicker in actions.
• Pastors extracting fees for “delivering” the child (ren). 
• Pastors incarcerating and chaining up bewitched children in churches for months at a time, whilst they undergo horrific exorcisms, which often involved drinking poisonous substances, severe beatings and torture
• Rejection of a child and placed in isolation from family
• Constant on slut of household wickedness around a child.
• Child abuse destroys the roots of the child's spiritual existence and future, for years into adulthood, if they do not seek help, it can lead to a lot of negative issues that faces the nation today like prostitution, killings, robberies, drunkenness, drugs, madness, insecurity & instability of life etc.